Zombie Customerhttps://dsligon.files.wordpress.com/2013/08/zombie.jpeg

13 Aug

zombie

We have all seen the movies of the great shuffling horde that pushes against the gates of the survivor’s stronghold, clawing and trying to force their way in.  They moan and push and pull causing tension on those inside while you wonder how long it can last.  Apparently this whole design template for several movies was inspired by this customer type.  That and Black Friday.

We can give the Zombies a pass in the movies.  They are hungry mindless automatons who are actually just trying to eat you.  The Customer Zombie is much more annoying.  This customer will come up and pull on the door then stare at it confused.  They think, “Why won’t this open.”  They might even take a second to look at the hours that are posted next to the door before they try again.  But even that won’t send them on their way.  Now they will just sit and wait.  Surely you’ll have to break.  They can outlast your meager supplies.

The Customer Zombie gets even more interesting though.  They will arrive as much as an hour before the store opens.  This isn’t the five minutes before hand.  This person knows they will need to wait a good while before the doors part.  Depending on the weather they will either sit in their car or pace in front of the door.  In cases of Mall locations, they’ll put their hands on the gate and stare at you while you try to get things ready.  Occasionally they will yell questions through the gate assuming that you must be free to answer their inquisitive nature.  After all, there isn’t a reason in their minds why the gate is still down.  If you are in a location with an actual door, expect them to try to peer in through the window to see you every five minutes.

At some point, you have to allow them in.  Now the second part of the zombie reference.  They won’t need your help and are just looking.  That is right.  The person who has been hanging outside your store eager to get in, pestering you by tugging on the doors or shaking the gate, really just wanted to peruse your shelves to decide if there was anything they like.  This is of course if they actually say anything to you at all and don’t just go as far from you as possible.

A game release Tuesday seems to encourage their presence.  Keep in mind that they aren’t there for the game.  Sometimes, they will be shocked to realize that a game even released that day.  “There is a new game out?” They’ll ask in complete and legitimate shock.  They assume that the twenty people who showed up 5 minutes after open all to buy the same game are mere coincidence.  Most times they’ll just walk around for ten to fifteen minutes than leave without much more than a few words.

So now that you know how to identify the Customer Zombie what should you do?  As Zombie bashing legality is still debated you can’t remove them.  Pretty much keep doing your job.  Keep an eye on them to make sure they aren’t trying to steal and do whatever other task requires your attention.  They are pretty self-sufficient and apparently don’t actually want your help.  But at least you now understand that they are not a unique phenomenon.

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